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CHOOSE YOUR ROOMMATES CAREFULLY

Choose Your Future Roommates Wisely!
Do you have the Demon roommate from hell?
Do you fantasize about taking revenge on your roommate who makes the loudest belching sound in North America?
Are you fed up with the roommate wandering around the apartment in filthy underwear?
Are you the roommate who never does the dishes and feels insulted when asked to do your 'fair share'?

It is half way through the semester and Student Legal Service has already heard many stories of students who are prepared to stay in the ir rooms until the end of the lease rather than deal with any more roommate conflict.
Living together in a roommate situation is a fundamental part of your college experience whether for good or bad.
The key not to have a horrible roommate experience is prevention. It is completely unnecessary for students to be apartment hunting for Fall'07 in October of 2006, yet many of you are doing so and are locking yourselves into contracts with roommates you barely know. The earliest you should begin looking for an apartment is the last week of January.
If you are determined to go ahead anyway, use the following roommate precautionary check list:

1. Do you really know the potential roommate?
A personal friend may be your worst roommate as that friend may rely on the friendship to get you to acquiesce in his/her intolerable behavior.

2. Is the roommate financially able to pay the rent?
Remember if the roommate doesn't pay the rent you are then legally responsible for their portion of the rent.

3. How is the roommate doing academically?
If the roommate flunks out of school (remember it is too early to be sure at this point in the semester), you will be stuck with their rent or stuck with subletting their portion of the unit.

4. Is the potential roommate considering studying abroad or a practicum away from Urbana-Champaign?
If this is a possibility, then by all means don't sign a joint lease with this individual. Those studying abroad should find a single unit or be able to guarantee a sublet for you.

5. Is the potential roommate someone you really can live with?
Until you share a living space with another person this question can be difficult to answer but certain clues indicate to some degree the likelihood of a successful roommate environment.

The clues include drinking, smoking, and drug habits of the roommate. If you are a teetotaler and your roommate is a party animal, conflict is inevitable. If these habits are evident at this point in the semester, there is no reason to believe that they will change next year.

If you enjoy having overnight guests and your potential roommate values privacy and is a bit prudish, it is unfair for you to impose your values on this potential roommate.

If you do all of your studying just before exams but your future roommate wants a quiet rule for studying throughout the term, major conflicts will definitely arise.

Acknowledging now that in many areas you will be incompatible will allow you to keep a friend while searching for a different roommate.

Before you sign a joint lease it is wise to sign a roommate agreement which covers the foregoing areas of concern. The simple act of mutually drafting such an agreement can clear the air and prevent future problems.

If you already have the roommate whom you are ready to toss off of the third floor balcony, there are a few things you should consider before you give that final shove.

Like a marriage, a successful roommate situation requires communication.
Chatting with each other helps keep the basic relationship.
Let each other know who you are and what is happening in your life.
If something is bothering you in the household, don't let the concern fester until there is an explosion.
Be honest in letting your roommate or roommates know what is bothering you.
Talk things out on a regular basis.

At least three things can be done to keep communication alive and conflict to a minimum:
1. Hold regular household meetings, once or twice a month.
2. Leave written messages if you are not able to match schedules for meeting. Avoid blaming and judging the roommate at the meetings or in the note. This usually makes the person defensive and angry.
3. Schedule a 'roommates only' meal together occasionally. This can facilitate discussion and resolution of conflicts.

In the rare event nothing seems to resolve the conflict it is still unwise to shove the roommate over the balcony. Murder does carry the death penalty in Illinois although rarely used. Life imprisonment is not really all that much better if you are convicted.

It would be far wiser to get everyone together and schedule an appointment at the Center for Conflict Resolution at the Turner Student Services Building (4th Floor). That office provides trained mediators to resolve all kinds of disputes with a very high rate of success.

A third party, who's neutral, can pinpoint the concerns and suggest areas of compromise and areas where changes will be needed to bring about an acceptable living environment.

Don't despair, even the worst roommate situations can be improved.

Student Legal Service can provide you with advice before you sign a lease with the roommate from hell but not after , as we are precluded from advising one student against another.

It is imperative that you not get into a bad situation to begin with.

Thomas E. Betz, Staff Attorney